What I really want to do is write the story that is tied into the Whitman quote below and to share with you my focus on tearing down the walls and obstacles but my wishes and wants aren’t always the priority.
There is a part of me that is playing around with giving you a glimpse of what really lies under the surface but some of you will attempt to misuse that information and others will be rendered paralyzed so we’ll put a pin in that one.
Instead I’ll tell you I have been that guy on the Internet who has been arguing with others about politics things I see as having great import.
Except I have been doing it without concern about whether minds will be changed, opened or expanded.
Been doing it without concern for real dialogue because the places and people I have been engaged with generally don’t see me as a person.
I am certain some of them believe as they say that my race/religion makes me less than them and have waded into the fray knowing this in advance.
But I have hoped that some of these conversations would either wake people up and make them reconsider their positions or at least recognize eyes are upon them and there are consequences.
Maybe that is just stupidity and fool hardiness or maybe it is something more.
What I know is when a person asked if I would visit them with bullets and fists I suggested they provide contact information because maybe I would send them flowers.
A Facebook friend asked me why I don’t respond to every comment they make about my political posts.
“I don’t have time, energy or inclination to argue every point especially when I know you focus on minutiae that makes it clear you don’t understand the bigger picture.”
They were taken aback because it was so blunt and because they’re convinced I am the one who misses the big picture.
I don’t care.
I said my piece and I mean what I said.
The current hand life has dealt requires a significant amount of energy, focus and attention.
There are things going on now that are of paramount importance that I cannot allow to be screwed up and I have almost no ability to control them.
At best I can help manage them by nudging and pushing a bit to try and stay upon a path that I can barely see.
It is fair to say I am frustrated and angry and that impacts some of what I do and how I do it.
But it is also fair to say I don’t let anger guide every decision. I think about the choices I make and rely more upon logic than knee jerk emotion.
Doesn’t mean I am an automaton and that I never screw up but the norm is for me to calm and collected.
And it is because we have elected a terrible person and awful president that I find myself pushing in other areas because I can’t watch while ignorant animals run amok.
Sometimes you step out and take action because even the little things can make a difference.
The Great Gatsby
I consume huge amounts of content and always have.
For years I was the guy who would read multiple books each week and if not each week than each month.
Some of that has gone up and down as my responsibilities have changed but it never has reached a place or point where I don’t read.
Occasionally I have picked up a book not realizing that I had already read it, but rarely has it ever been anything that is considered a classic.
The other day someone asked me about The Great Gatsby and I realize I can’t remember if I read it or not.
I think I have, but I am really not sure.
That bothers me a little bit as old Man Fitzgerald and I should be acquainted especially as I have been known to use some of his quotes here and there.
There are about 30 boxes of books in my garage that I need to go through and part of me is thinking now might be a good time to dig in and see if Gatsby is in my own stacks.
But another part of me is concerned about the chaos that might come with unleashing myself upon those boxes because I will undoubtedly be distracted.
I will pull some out and build a stack next to my nightstand which is not a horrible thing, but the rub is I haven’t time to go through them all right now.
So part of me wonders if the better option is to buy a copy because a visit to the library leads to the same challenge as going through my boxes.
It is like being a chocolate addict in a candy store, although as addictions go reading is not a bad one.