I Used To Be Your Baby

I called my buddy Pablo and told him I went to the Main Street Bistro & Bakery for lunch today.

“Pablo, it was a business meal, but it was nice to have company. I rarely have company or any sort of companionship so it was a pleasant change.”

He didn’t respond so I continued.

“I am not complaining because I expected things to be like this for a while, but it does get old. And given how crazy things have been post election it was nice to have a meal where the people around me felt happy and not crazed.”

“If nothing saves us from death, at least love should save us from life” ― Pablo Neruda

I Used To Be Your Baby

I thanked Pablo for his words of wisdom and for taking time to listen to me and changed gears.

A certain 12-year-old girl who calls me dad recently told me she used to be my baby.

It was her way of reminding me that she isn’t a baby anymore and expects me to treat her as a “pre-teen who is practically a teen.”

I told her I would do my best and reiterated some of what I said here, “I don’t do text.”

Well, that is not entirely true my children are given special dispensation in that I will sometimes accommodate more text communication with them than I will other people.

But there are moments where I demand they use the phone because I want to be certain they know how to carry on a conversation using words and not emoji.

Musical Intermission

Call Me– Blondie
I Would Do Anything For Love-Meatloaf
(Night time Is) The Right Time – Ray Charles
Question– The Moody Blues
Witchita Lineman– Glen Campbell
Band On The Run– Paul McCartney & Wings
Brothers In Arms– Dire Straits
The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face– Johnny Cash
All I Know– Art Garfunkel
Seven Spanish Angels – Willie Nelson & Ray Charles
This Is Us– Emmylou Harris & Mark Knopfler
I Want to Take You Higher– Sly and the Family Stone

A Freaking Clown Car

Those of you who know me well have probably heard me say things like “no risk, no reward” more than once.

It is not something I take lightly but I believe in it.

I learned long ago that if you do what you have always done you’ll get what you have always gotten.

Without going into unnecessary detail about other things that is really what pushed me to step outside of my comfort zone and to try to live the who risk/reward thing.

Anyhoo, as I have been trying to build life here in Texas I have thought about it quite a bit.

Thought about the risks incurred when you move and you have limited support/resources.

That was one of the reasons I agreed to have surgery before I moved.

The doc said I could have done it in December but I wasn’t sure whether I would be able to ask anyone for help after and figured it was better not to have to worry about it.

Hell, I didn’t like having to rely upon anyone for help in LA so I really didn’t want to have to worry about it here.

And given the last week or two since the election I am doubly certain I made the right choice. I don’t know about you, but it feels like someone opened a clown car of chaos.

Every time I think the car is empty a couple more clowns jump out.

Thanksgiving

I have been playing around with whether I’ll pick up some odds and ends and cook my own Thanksgiving dinner or go out to eat.

Some friends have asked if I am bothered by spending it alone and I said I’ll miss some of the things we cook this time of year, but I’ll be fine.

It is not like I am homeless or will go hungry.

No one is shooting at me and I know this is part of a plan that will be of great benefit to my family.

I don’t have problems spending time alone so it is fine.

That being said I wouldn’t want to do this every year. I am very cognizant of time and of trying to spend it with people who are important to me.

deathdickinson

How Long Will We Live?

Two weeks ago a dear friend called me and asked me to be certain to get a physical.

When I asked him what prompted his concern he told me about a friend of his who had literally dropped dead.

He was in his late forties and seemed like he was in decent shape. I didn’t know him well, but I did know him.

Anyway, something happened and now his kids are without a father.

It truly is tragic and I feel badly for them.

We don’t know how much time we have and though I expect to live for another 60 years it might not happen.

I could be gone next week and all you’d have are the memories we shared or the crazy ramblings you see here.

To be clear, I have told death that he ought to think of his own safety and stay far away from me.

You may call that bravado but I say my being here is proof it is more than just that.

Hell, a good hug from me can send a pleasant shock up and down your body, or maybe it is that Taser I carry. Who can remember. 😉

Got to run now, there are stories to be told and stories to be experienced.

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