We Hired Some Movers

It feels like packing up a life and that is probably because it is just that…packing up a life.

My daughter saw the pants and asked if I have worn suspenders during her lifetime and I shrugged my shoulders because I am not sure.

Worn them multiple times but when and how long ago are questions whose answers escape me. Reminded me of sitting in a Coffee Bean in LA last week talking with the guys about how much work is involved in packing.

They asked how long it would take and I shrugged my shoulders again, “as long as it takes.”

Reminded me of the conversation I had with my father after he told me he was getting his leg amputated. I asked him to tell me why and he said it would give him an indefinite amount of time.

When I sat graveside I told him several stories including how someone told me that if you miss certain windows you can’t hit them again until your fifties and that it wouldn’t work then.

“Dad, I said then I thought it was a ridiculous comment and that it irritated me because I don’t like it when people make uniform decisions about a shared future without consulting me. But you know me, I make people crazy because I can’t be controlled. And some I make crazier because when I have had enough, it is enough.”

He didn’t respond, there was no knock from the coffin in the earth below, no wind, no thunder nor lightning. Can’t say I was shocked or surprised by that, it was expected

Scheduled my appointment with the cardiologist today and walked into a living room full of boxes and stuff.

On the way back to the computer I looked at his picture and said “we hired some movers” but didn’t finish the thought because my phone rang.

Why Did You Do That?

My daughter asked me why I responded a certain way and I said it was because I was setting boundaries. Not sure she followed my line of logic and reasoning but she didn’t ask for me to elucidate and I didn’t offer.

Later I mentioned to my son that women think differently than we do and fight very differently. “She won’t throw a physical punch but she may try to hurt you with words. You’ll have to figure out if it was intentional or otherwise.

Sometimes you’ll need clarification and sometimes you’ll want to stay silent.”

I don’t know how we got to that place but I do know how we laughed when we talked about a customer service snafu.

“I think she was surprised when I expressed my displeasure. She took two steps back. I am sure I didn’t raise my voice.”

He nodded his head and said I hadn’t.

“I did see you real it back in.”

“She is young, she didn’t mean to irk me that way. Her enthusiasm got the best of her. If she had taken a beat she would have understood I didn’t need her to take my phone and enter anything into the app.

I wasn’t about to just snatch it back but I wasn’t not going to say something either. I didn’t need another $25 bucks loaded on my card. I prefer to pay as I go.”

A few hours earlier I was on the other side of it speaking with someone about their concerns and offered my own solution.

They didn’t like it but it had less to do with me and more to do with their not being appreciative of a specific situation.

“I can’t control the weather. I offered help based upon what I can control.”

I told the younger Mr. Wilner about it and shared how we can both say the same thing but my words are taken more seriously.

“It is not entirely fair, but I have decades of experience on you and sometimes that leads people to take me more seriously, regardless of whether it is deserved.

I disliked it when I was your age, but that is something I can’t change. It is like driving certain cars, I am old enough that no one would say I am driving dad’s car.”

Got an email on LinkedIn and thought about possibilities.

I’m the Director of Graduate Studies at Full Sail University. Based on your profile and experience in journalism I think you would make a great fit for our New Media Journalism master’s degree. Our classes begin monthly in this, accelerated, 12-month program, so you can earn your graduate degree sooner than you think.

There is some interest there but not enough to explore further. I am not familiar with the school so I can’t say how seriously it is taken in the marketplace which doesn’t add any weight to their efforts to make me look at things either.

But then again I am not looking to make any more big changes or necessarily looking to get promoted. Can’t say I am not open to opportunities because I’ll listen to those that come along, but I am not searching.

It is an interesting place to occupy, this place in my career where I am more cautious about making moves.

Got just enough time left that I am not going to retire for a good while but not so much that I want to spend any real time in a position I hate either.

I am in that place where I want to focus on doing what I enjoy as much as possible. I don’t need to chase people who don’t find me interesting or place me as a secondary option.

We’re in the like me or don’t like me phase of life which is probably a good description of where I have been for quite some time now.

This speech from Menachem Begin is 43 year old. I didn’t post it to discuss whether his comments are still relevant or to review any of the inherent politics in it.

I like the clarity, confidence and decisiveness of it. I appreciate it telling a coherent story.

It feels like some of that is missing now and maybe it is because there are too many people who support the felon who is the GOP candidate.

Maybe it is because there is loud vocal minority on the left who have turned DEI from a worthy endeavor into a disastrous attempt to classify the world into good and bad without delving into existing complexity.

Or maybe it is because the world just felt simpler then than it does now.

Can’t run nor hide from the complexity, we can only sail into and through it. You dance in the fire or you burn, there are no other options and that is ok.