You’re Making Me Angry

I have played around with making this a sort of Festivus type post in which I tell some of you why I am angry and how I been mistreated.

Because some of you have taken advantage of my goodwill and acted in a manner that you wouldn’t accept. If I refused to have discussions about important topics you would never tolerate it.

You have benefited from behavior that is unusual for me and avoided reading my full thoughts and ideas or discussing them.

Maybe it is my own fault for expecting more or from trying to navigate things that don’t come with maps.

And some of you think that your abhorrent behavior and idiotic commentary is acceptable because I haven’t laid out in explicit terms what a profound disappointment you have become.

You mistake my lack of response as acceptance or perhaps you think I fear to say what I think. Both are wrong and the reality is my silence has more to do with my lack of faith in your willingness to engage with fact.

I don’t have time to use facts to beat sense into you or maybe I lack energy. Both can be true.

I have a long list of frustrations but my list of things I am grateful exceeds that. I remind myself of this often.

The Sign Of A Good Relationship

I follow a simple precept in my personal and professional lives about how I define the hallmark of a good relationship.

It is one in which we can be honest and speak about what isn’t working because I can’t fix what is broken if I am not aware of it.

I also pay attention to whether I have interest in fixing what is broken. That desire to do or not do so is something I pay close attention to.

The internal metronome that helps demarcate it provides some tools I use for understanding why I do or do not want to work on things.

I know quite a bit about what it means to have good, honest communication where you are truly naked and what it means to hide.

I know of walls, how to build and how to tear down.

Impromptu Content Break Consisting of Recent Posts

• You’re Part Of An Unhinged Cult- A Love Story?

• They Call Me Josh, The Taurus

• When Cleveland June Met LA Johnny & Other Stories Part 33

• Why Did Dad Die?

You’re Explosive

Many years ago someone described me as being explosive. It made me angry because I wanted to be seen as easy going and low maintenance.

Explosive didn’t sound like either and for a while it irked me and I could feel it fester. Ask me about it today and I’ll say it is not unfair to call me explosive but it does take quite a bit to get me there.

Back then I thought I was very clear in letting people know they were irritating me. I thought they understood my words and recognized I was telling them what they were doing was causing issues.

Today I work hard to make sure there is no misunderstanding that I am getting irritated. I may be more specific in saying that what you are doing is chapping my hide.

If you ignore that there will come a time when it might feel explosive because instead of speaking in a softer tone I may raise my voice and smack my hand on a table or wall for emphasis.

That place between soft and loud can change very quickly but again if you look at what led to that point you’ll usually find there has been a series of events. It rarely happens in a minute.

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I have been listening to Bono’s audiobiography on Audible and found much of it to be quite interesting. I listen to quite a few books that way including a variety of fiction and non fiction titles.

It is part of how I pass the time in the car driving from place to place. Sometimes it takes a minute for me to get into the book but I am pretty good at finding a way to lock into them and to enjoy.

Audio books offer a different experience than reading, but there is still value in them.

Time moves so quickly, if you don’t use your mind you’ll wake up and discover you have run out of time.

That scares me a bit sometimes, this feeling of time flying by but then again there are those moments where I feel like I am able to grab a hold and slow it down…just a little bit.