Try Some Viagra

There are conversations I want to have and conversations I need to have but I never expected my dad to say Try Some Viagra.

Count those three words as being among those I never wanted nor needed to hear from him though it would be poetic as he was most unhappy when I bought an economy size box of condoms at Costco in 1998.

Most unhappy might be an exaggeration but I have a vivid memory of him saying he didn’t think I needed that many and my responding with “you never know.”

Flash forward a lifetime and you get the unexpected, unwanted and unsought for, “try some Viagra.”

The funny thing is unless you believe in ghosts he didn’t say it to me because it happened last week during a dream that I can only remember pieces of.

So I can’t remember the context of the how or why he said it or if I responded. Maybe it is because nature called and I wandered into the bathroom at 6 something in the AM and stood in the dark wondering if I had remembered to lift the seat.

Washed my hands and debated climbing back into bed but chose to head the extra 15 feet of my office and started checking email.

Promise me, Son, Not To Do The Things I’ve Done

Told my son a bit about some of the conversations about the protests including those at his sister’s university and we talked about the hostages.

He told me he had heard about some of the things the families of the hostages were doing and I shook my head.

He wasn’t judgmental, it was just a conversation and yet I still had to tell him that since he wasn’t a parent he couldn’t imagine the agony.

“You know that if god forbid you or your sister were in trouble I cannot tell you what lengths I would be willing to go to. I can’t imagine what these families are dealing with nor do I ever want to find out. I don’t need to know.”

Somehow that led to me quoting Coward Of The County and we moved onto other things and more pleasant topics.

Somewhere in between discussions about moving, the future and how why I would prefer not to work with a 25 year-old broker we got into a discussion about Legos and Legoland.

I asked him if he remembered when he wanted to become a Legoland designer and build the displays at one of the theme parks.

We discussed what that might pay and if it was a significant salary. I spent the next five minutes illustrating how the skills required for such a position could be used in job interviews.

“Hell, you could even talk about your experience building Lego sets now and turn that into something special. It demonstrates the ability to follow instructions, complete a task and ingenuity required to adapt and adjust if you are missing a piece.”

He reminded me that he wasn’t looking for work and I smiled.

“True and that is good but there will come a time when you are interested in a promotion or position and being able to talk about skills and abilities is useful, especially if you in can put them into terms everyone understands.

I Can Argue Both Sides

Given all that is going on I would be remiss if I didn’t mention there is a rumor the horrible kid at Columbia who said “Zionists Don’t Deserve to Live” was expelled.

I have heard people debate whether that was appropriate and never doubted it made sense to me though I can argue both sides.

That is something I try to work on in multiple areas of life, the ability to argue both sides. It is not for lack of willingness or ability to take a position but because it is how I find comfort in many decisions.

If I can take a topic and debate both sides of it I generally can find one side that I relate to or believe in more strongly and that is useful.

Speaking of useful I was glad to hear that Howard Stern interviewed President Biden. I appreciated the interview, Howard is among the best in the business.

Some people might be surprised to hear that but he really is particularly adept at it and given the choice between Joe and the corrupt crook on the other side I am a fan of giving Joe a platform to reach more potential voters.

Speaking of elections I was glad to hear Maya Platek, the newly elected student body president at Columbia speak.

She sounds like she is not going to put up with any crap and that is good news.