I got the news that I would probably be moving again earlier this week but I didn’t get final confirmation until this afternoon.
Took about two minutes to read through the email and then I said screw it and pretended I was Han telling Chewie to ‘punch it!”
My new car is cool but not as cool as a couple of the convertibles in this music video but when the thermostat says 104 maybe you don’t want to go flying up 360 without the AC on anyway.
A stoplight took me out of my Star Wars cosplay and I took a moment to give some tourists in a truck next to me directions to Hurricane Harbor.
Since I was lost in thought I almost told them to take the 405 to the 5 which would have been accurate if I was in LA and offering guidance, but they wanted to hit Arlington so I self corrected and threw on some driving music.
Texas drivers are particularly bad, so the music helped ease the irritation I felt about having to move. I didn’t want to react out of anger. That would be like unfriending someone because their favorite player left their team.
Got to focus your anger in the right place and not paint yourself into a corner. Trust me, I have done it once or twice before, but I digress.
The funny thing about it is I have been playing around with moving and had investigated it but I had chosen not to do it because I just didn’t have the bandwidth to deal with it.
Had too many other important things to deal with, but sometimes things happen and our ability to choose goes along with it.
And so it went here, things happened, choices were made by others and now decision time on where to hang my approaches again.
Part of me thinks I ought to turn this into a short video featuring me playing the blues but the thing is, I don’t know how to play the guitar and I am not much of a singer.
I suppose listening to me sing might make some of you sing the blues too, depending on whether I was really trying to belt a song out or not.
Anyhoo, my hosting company was sold to another and now I have to take time to read about the new hosting plan and figure out whether I stay or move somewhere new.
There are bigger problems but this is a little bit like reading about the cellphone plans or cable bill with one big exception– I am ultimately responsible for the tech issues that will undoubtedly come from the change.
Singing along with the Doobies:
Need a place just to settle out my pressures
A place where you and I can sit and pause
So I can see the sky at night
Without a fear of hidden light to blind me
I suppose if I am going to be forced to make changes I ought to take a hard look at the theme I use here and determine if there is a better one to use.
As often as I say it is critical to write posts that are educational, entertaining and informative it is also crucial to provide an easy way for people to read them too.
Where Is Home?
I haven’t seen my middle sister in almost a full year. I guess that is what happens when you live in different states.
We speak on a regular basis and have been in close contact about our dad. Both of us have been back to LA two or three times since his diagnosis but we have semi-intentionally not gone at the same time.
It is not because there are any problems between us but because it seemed like an easier way to help support our mom.
By not crossing over we could extend the time that one of us was in town helping out, but that changes this time around.
We won’t get a ton of time together, but we’ll get some.
I figure there will be a few moments where we’ll gather our younger sisters and the four of us will spend time alone with our parents.
That doesn’t happen very often and that is ok. We all have families now and there is something nice about getting everyone together.
But for a moment it will be nice to have it just be the six of us. For a moment we’ll get to be just son and daughters again.
For a moment we’ll straddle the past and the present and stare off into the future.
And then it will pass and I’ll be very aware of my children watching how I handle the uncertain certainty of it all.
It will be strange not to go home to our house as it always is. Strange to know someone else is walking through the halls and sleeping in our rooms.
Part of me doesn’t care because people make the places we occupy into something more than just walls and a roof.
But there are so many memories tied up in it part of me feels like it is where we should be but that is not going to happen.
Don’t mistake that to mean I am sad or ambivalent about it. I live in neither extreme.
Sometimes it is just about moving on.
One Day At A Time
Got nothing special to do on the 4th other than clean up and pack. No big plans to see fireworks or barbecues to attend.
I may or may not go out. May or may not take a ride just to get some air.
Going to just take the day as it comes and see if the things I feel in my gut turn out to have any truth to them.
Told my son the other day that I have worked very hard not to just react and respond in anger to people.
Said that I am doing my best to take space when needed and to give it as well.
People come and go and they don’t always know if they are going to come back when they leave anymore than we know.
So we leave doors and windows cracked so we can get some air and so that we or they can walk in again if so inclined.
Sometimes we move on down the road and see what lies around the bend and sometimes we sit on the porch watching the clouds move by.
Of course now that I have to move again I suppose I won’t have as much time to just sit. Probably should read the damn plan and see whether moving is a requirement.
Maybe it will be like the Who says and the new boss will be the same as the old boss. Guess I’ll find out soon enough.