Clowns & Triggers

The world looks a little bit different after you help your father move all of his medical gear.

The old CPAP machine for sleep apnea is old hat and though sleep apnea can be dangerous it doesn’t feel the same as helping set up the portable dialysis paraphernalia.

It is a reminder of mortality and though no one ever knows how long or short their thread is it is a sobering vision.

This is a new adventure for the old man, but newer to me because tonight was the first time I had seen it in all its glory.

It took a moment for me to realize it had set me off a bit, that it had upset me a bit and made me want to go after some of the dumb clowns I come across on Facebook.

There is one particular moron I usually ignore, another dumb hick whose ego is tied up in the size of the truck and the hogs he hunts.

Most days if I notice him I root for the hogs to get him, but I rarely react or respond cuz he is too stupid to waste time on.

But tonight was different, tonight the clown set me off and I wrote some particularly nasty remarks and then deleted them.

I was triggered, but not by him.

The Better Part Of Valor

I felt a bit better when I realized what had set me off and then blocked him.

It wasn’t because I wanted to, because the truth is the big dope got my attention a while back by nosing around where he doesn’t belong.

So the reality is I would gladly tell him where he can go and thank him for helping to hurt others by electing an incompetent conman.

It would be fun to do so, assuming that he can understand multi syllabic words and phrases. But it is waste of my time and provided he doesn’t come looking for me I won’t go searching for him.

Blocking him was a part of staying focused on people and things that matter. Let the hogs have him.

The better part of valor is continuing to work on meeting the goals I set for myself a while back.

And it is also a good way to follow the advice I give my children to pay attention to those who are worth our time.

Some people add to our lives and some take away from them.

Spend your time and energy on the friends and family who love you and whom you love. Focus your attention on being a good friend to them and or making new friends.

Let the others who drag you down or insist on one sided relationships fall to the wayside.

An Open Hand

That open hand is what it is about.

Help others stand up and hold it out for those who wish to walk with you.

It was a little strange and a little uncomfortable carrying the equipment, but it is how it is now.

Won’t make myself crazy crying about what I can’t change, so I’ll just go along with what is.

It is just one more step on the journey and one more piece of the adventure and a reminder to keep working out.

Genetics plays a big role in our lives, but not the only one.

Got to keep working out and making sure to take time to talk with the people who are important to us.

Love hard and love now because tomorrow isn’t a given and you never know who will still be around to spend time with you.

Those who love us and wish to walk, well keep walking with them.

Those who don’t can take their path elsewhere. You never know whose road intersects or diverges from ours, it is part of what makes life interesting.

But damn, sometimes this adult thing can be really hard.

Full stop and goodbye.

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